Wednesday, October 28, 2020

I understand now.

 I understand now,
That it’s come to be,

The pain I feel within,

Will never leave me. 


I understand now,

What the people say,

When you are struck with it,

It’s here to stay. 


I understand now,

That each of us will have it,

No one gets away from it,

The pain pierced to inhabit.


I understand now,

Those shallow eyes we see,

Behind the brightest smile,

That peace will never be.


I understand now,

The children on their own,

The parents without their kids,

It makes you feel alone.


I understand now,

Life works in ways,

We may never understand,

But better come are days.


I understand now,

That within the mercy of the heart,

We pray and seek and shout,

It tears us apart.


I understand now,

The sadness in the songs,

The lyrics so gentle,

But ultimately so strong.


I understand now,

Grief does never leave,

No matter the days gone by,

It acts just like a thief.


I understand now,

That I will never be,

The naive girl,

That felt so young and free.


I understand now,

What it means to love so hard,

That you’re so afraid,

You hold so near your cards.


I understand now,

The grief they talk of slow,

For its presence,

Begins and never goes.


I understand now,

What it means to be alive,

And how we can never

Stop, but have to thrive. 


I understand now,

The pain that courses deep,

How that cripples,

When all we can do is weep.


I understand now,

The beauty of the past,

How it keeps us still,

If we don’t fight back.


I understand now,

How strong I’m meant to be,

When fear and pain is all I feel,

But I will not be on my knee.


I understand now,

How to live,

And laugh and smile again,

Because this pain is within me now,

I’ve nothing but to gain.


I understand now,

How happiness feels,

how quick it can be gone,

I’ll never stop loving,

To do that would be wrong. 


I understand now,

That it’s come to be,

This pain I feel within,

Will never leave me.


But I’m ok with that,

I’ve learnt to live unheard,

Because the pain within drives me,

Best believe I feel assured. 

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